In which Melface reveals how lazy and indifferent she is and requests your help... or something

Hello my followers/minions!

There are three of you now! A real army! Dismiss the fact that I know all of you IRL. It matters little. Your interest in my blog will soon turn to devotion and then addiction! Soon I will control your minds!

Okay, enough of that.

I've been pretty fail about this whole blogging thing. Granted, I never promised I'd be constant, but since the Fall semester ended I really have no excuse. Except that I'm ridiculously lazy. Not that it's a good excuse, but it is true. I don't like to think of myself as lazy because I'm pretty much always busy, but the last few weeks have showed me that my laziness knows no bounds; I am a danger to myself.

Let me explain. 

Of course, the holidays have a busyness all their own, but Christmas was relatively relaxed for me this year and, since Christmas, life has been downright easy. Without classes, my only true obligation is work and my part-time hours mean that I only work three days a week. That's right. My days off work outnumber the days I work. So what have I been doing the last two weeks in my great number of off hours? Almost nothing. I mean, I've been reading a lot (last week I read six books) and I've gone to the movies a couple times, and even hung out with friends a little. And those things are fun, but completely unproductive. And this time I can't even blame my boyfriend because he's been out of the country.

Case in point, I'm so lazy I took a break just now from writing this blog so I could eat potato chips and a bagel in front of my fireplace for a while. Pure laziness and my mother's cold-intolerant genes.

So the last two weeks has more or less been me doing what I do best: inactive-type activities. And do I regret this? Not a bit. That's probably the worse part; I'm completely unrepentant.

But alas, all things must eventually end. Today I had a long list of to-dos and I managed to do all of them (except play WoW but this was obviously less of a necessity and more of a fervent wish) including a number of things I had been putting off for weeks. So I guess today was a win and I did feel pretty good about it, but it wasn't as much fun as my lazy lounging.

From here on out I have a number of rather serious projects for myself. For example, find a job. Now that I'm finished with all my undergrad work, my three-days-a-week part-time job just won't cut it. A friend of mine (who just completed her Master's) shared that when her relatives ask what her plans are for her vacation she reminds them that, technically, it is less a vacation and more like unemployment now. Well, I'm in the same boat. Now that undergrad is complete, I need to find a job that offers me way more hours. So the job hunt is officially on! Have I mentioned that I hate job-hunting? Then again, I doubt anyone really cares for it. I'll also be applying for grad school, but the earliest I would start is in Fall, so I need to be working and saving up money in the meantime.

Speaking of saving money, I am putting aside money for two trips this summer that I'm very excited about: Disney World/Universal  Studios, Florida/The Wizarding World of Harry Potter and VidCon2011.

Let's talk about VidCon! :D I went to VidCon 2010 (the first year of VidCon) and it was probably the highlight of my summer. VidCon is a Youtube video convention organized by the vlogbrothers (John and Hank Green) and features a variety of the hottest Youtubers including sketch groups, vloggers, and musicians. It's basically everything you love about Youtube (and, by extension, the internet) live and in-person. It's pretty small in convention terms (I'm used to Anime Expo and BlizzCon) so it feels pretty intimate. Last year I got pictures and autographs with almost all of my favorite Youtubers and this year looks like it might be even better.

So what did we learn today? (Correct answer: "I want to go to VidCon 2011.")

Oh! And if you buy your registration for VidCon 2011 RIGHT NOT (or until Monday, Jan 10th anyway) you only pay $70. Trust me, it's worth it. But I'm just sayin'.

I decided to change the font just now. Minions/friends, what you do think of this font? Keep in mind that my options (and my interest) are limited. Does it look any different to you? How does it make you feel?

Now, about my indifference. I'm not actually indifferent, but I keep wondering if it seems like I am. As previously mentioned, my boyfriend is out of town (for three-ish weeks) and everyone seems to expect this to really bother me and keeps asking how I'm doing in his absence, if I'm missing him/lonely, etc. Of course I miss him. I love my boyfriend and I miss seeing him sometimes when he's in town and we don't get much time together. But I'm not lonely or upset or even jealous and I'm certainly not just waiting for him to come home. I love that he's traveling abroad even if it is without me--this time anyway. But this doesn't seem to be the response that everyone wants. I'm supposed to say how lonely I am without him, how I'm just counting down days til he comes home, etc. But, I'm not really the girl who sits at home waiting. Even though I've spent a lot of time at home lately, none of it felt like wasting time or waiting. 

The first week he was away, my family was watching me like a hawk and constantly attributing my actions to "She's missing Earl." It was annoying. The vast majority of that week was spent in perfectly normal, lazy activities. What did missing my boyfriend have to do with my reading? The one time it might have been justified was, at the end of that first week, when I randomly bought Earl a shirt that was on sale. I maintain that such an action was perfectly reasonable. The shirt was one of those flannel shirts that he's been fond of lately, it was on sale, and they had one is his size. Why wouldn't I buy it? Yes, I may have mentioned that the green would match his eyes, but really? It isn't like I've been using the shirt to fill his absence. The shirt is still in the bag from the store and has been in the same place in my room since I bought it: under my desk. 

There's a line in the book Jane Eyre that I really love in which one character, commenting on his connection to his soul-mate (the protagonist, Jane Eyre) says, "It is as if I had a string somewhere under my left ribs, tightly and inextricably knotted to a similar string situated in the corresponding quarter of your little frame. And if that boisterous channel, and two hundred miles or so of land come between us, I am afraid that cord of communion will be snapt; and then I've a nervous notion I should take to bleeding inwardly." I love that line, but in some ways I cannot relate. I do feel like there is a tie between us that is inextricably knotted, but I don't really feel like the distance is a strain. Is that unromantic of me? After all, it is only for a few weeks. We survived years without each other that made us the people we were/are and those years only made us more prepared to appreciate each other once we did find each other. We have plans to spend the rest of our lives together and, hopefully, that will be many, many years. 

Anyway, everyone's questions have made me a bit defensive and I wanted to be able to explain myself. And, in the end, it doesn't really matter if other people think I'm being indifferent. I know Earl likes that I find the idea of having an emotional crisis due to his absence... repugnant. We may be inextricably bound, but we are unique individuals.

Minions, I give you two tasks and they both involve commenting on this blog. If you want me to keep blogging , then give me a little motivation and encouragement by responding to my questions in comments. So, first task: respond to the unimportant font change. Second task: I want suggestions of a new, entertaining project I can undertake in addition to the more important, less fun projects already on my plate. What should I do? :D

Now, go! [I just wanted to end this blog with a command; is that so wrong?]

uh... NaNoWriMo update weeks 2-end?

Hey there!
So the original plan was to blog and vlog (youtube channel: m3lf4c3) for each week of NaNoWriMo 2010 so everyone could follow my progress, but obviously that didn't happen. I've been asked a few times since the beginning of the month (this month, mind you) if I managed to finish my novel for NaNoWriMo. The short answer is no, but I'll tell you the whole story ;)
I wrote my novel for the first couple weeks of November, but by week three it became apparent that if I continued with NaNoWriMo, I would not be able to keep up with my schoolwork (did I mention that I'm writing my senior thesis?) and there was no way I wanted to repeat my last semester of undergrad. I'm a pretty good student, but I can't balance all the normal paper-writing of school with novel writing. It really isn't an exaggeration to say that every day I missed my NaNoWriMo word count quota, I could have filled it with the hours of time spent researching and writing for my classes.
In addition to all my schoolwork, I was also experiencing a minor flare-up of my chronic fatigue syndrome all month, so I spent a lot of time sleeping, generally feeling run-down and fighting off infections.
So, in the end, I did not finish my novel, but I'm still an "A" student. So even though I'm not a winner and I fail at novel-writing, I'm still counting my first NaNoWriMo as a success. I had a blast, started a novel, and wrote more than I have for any project before. Plus, the experience didn't drive me to insanity or desperation.
I haven't decided yet if I'll take the time to finish my novel, but I really enjoyed the NaNoWriMo experience and I'm already planning to participate (and maybe win) in NaNoWriMo 2011. WOOOO! Who wants to join me?!? Guys? plz?
Anyway, back to normal life which, unfortunately, means finishing my senior thesis and generally wrapping-up the semester. By the end of this month, I'll be finished with my undergrad career FINALLY. Banzai!

NaNoWriMo Week 1 OVER!

Oh God, it was a long week. And I'll so far behind! I put a NaNoWriMo Widget on the blog page so you can keep up with my progress. I'm sitting at 6,338 right now without having fulfilled today's (Monday) quota so that's my week one total. But I'm supposed to be at 11,669 to finish on time, so I have just over half of what I'm supposed to. I'm doing my best, though and I will continue to try my hardest, but I won't lie I'm not sure I can do this. There is probably never a good time to try to write a novel in a month, but if there was it is not when you are in school (writing your thesis btw), working, and trying to see your boyfriend every once in a while too. So the days when I don't hit my NaNo quota, you can bet I'm writing, but I'm writing my thesis instead of a novel.
I'm still pretty optimistic. I know that with hard work and maybe a little blood, sweat, and tears I could still pull this off. I still believe! So cheer for me!
I basically have 22 days left to accomplish this. BANZAI! BANZAI! BANZAI!
Right now, I'd rather not post an excerpt of my novel on here. But we'll see if I change my mind.

ORly?

So I blogged I while back about how I ran into a woman at Borders and she invited me to the local chapter of the Jane Austen Society and I accepted and I was excited to go because of my general nerdiness and how nice and encouraging she was at a time when I needed the encouragement and I went and it was awesome. Remember? Remember? Well...
It so happens that Borders Lady is a relative of a friend of mine! LOL! and apparently they don't like her very much, but that's another story. Funny funny small world. Except not really because apparently Borders Lady spends a lot of time in Borders and invites a lot of people to the Jane Austen Society. I was a mere fly caught in her web :) But regardless, I was pleased to accept the invitation and I'm still planning to continue with the Janeites.
You may not have noticed but I didn't mention much about seeing that lady again at the meeting I attended though I had been pretty pleased to meet her. I made a big deal out of honoring her invitation and then I didn't mention whether I saw her or not. Well, I did see her, but I spent most of the time conversing with the Janeites my age and, while I did greet her, we only spoke in passing.
New friend? Not so much. But I am grateful for the encouragement she gave me and the invitation.
But this whole episode reminded me of why I was so hesitant to resume blogging. In order to blog, you have to reveal things about yourself, your hopes and dreams, your complaints and troubles, your humor, etc. While you can choose how much to reveal, regardless of what you reveal, you always run the risk of discovering you were mistaken, naive, etc. And when you blog it, it is public. And, in some way, you can't take it back. It is way easier to appear ignorant or silly when hindsight is 20/20 and there is a written record of your past thoughts.
But I'm going to continue blogging because I'm self-aware enough to be comfortable with appearing silly or ignorant. Sometimes I am those things. And sometimes I'm not. But I want to be able to share myself because there are so many people who have shared themselves with me.

Nanowrimo... I'm crazy

I've thrown my metaphorical hat into the ring. I have signed up to participate in this year's NaNoWriMo. If you don't know what that is --> link! http://www.nanowrimo.org/eng/whatisnano like magic!

It is really odd that I would choose to do this, for a few reasons: 1) I'm not an author, 2) I have no ambitions to be an author, 3) The vast majority of my writing is academic, typically history-related, 4) I'm currently writing my senior thesis to graduate, and 5) I don't have the time, energy or drive to "win."
But I'm going to give it a go anyway. I have never ever done anything like this before, and I'm not at all confident I'll finish anything on time, but how could you pass up the life experience? It's a big time commitment, but I'm risking very little for a chance to try something new, exciting, and challenging. I think if I can abstain from Korean dramas, reading, and video games for the month, I can do pretty well.
All in all, I have fairly low expectations of the result of my writing. I'm completely inexperienced and have to balance NaNoWriMo with my school work and academic writing. But I think that even if I don't finish my novel (which I assume I won't) I can be satisfied with my writing efforts and add it to my life resume.
As far as what I should write about, that is a bit more difficult. I have a bunch of story ideas that I've saved up over the years, but most of them more suited to a short story than a novel. Or I've outgrown the idea. Or I have a brilliant concept and a couple ideas for the story, but wouldn't want to write the whole thing. Sometimes I'm sure that creativity requires way more energy than I have available to me.

I have a week to come up with a plot I find exciting or compelling. Should be interesting.
Actually that probably encompasses my attitude toward NaNoWriMo, "Should be interesting." At the end of this month, I want to look back and feel that I was a part of an interesting and fun project alongside many more gifted authors. Let's try it!
Banzai! Banzai! Banzai!

Tea with Austen

Follow-up to my previous blog :)
This weekend I did visit my local Jane Austen Society meeting. I brought a friend along to the event, which was really a tea party/book discussion on the patio of a small-town tea shop.
Things I learned from the experience:
1) Members of the Jane Austen Society refer to themselves as "Janeites,"
2) Membership fees are pretty reasonable (yes, I'm definitely considering it),
3) I like scones way more than I thought (I ate three),
4) Although I was concerned about the age demographic, the college-age demographic was well represented amongst the members at the meeting,
5) Although this particular meeting was all-female, I have been informed that it was a first for the group and that there is usually at least one male member/participant, and
6) All of the Janeites present were intelligent women interested in analyzing Jane Austen's books (in this particular case Northanger Abbey) characters, and Jane herself. None of that bodice-ripping fantasy nonsense ;) I was a little relieved.
In any case, I intend to go to their next meeting (in a month) and I'll probably join. As my friend and I were leaving the meeting, I told her that I suddenly felt in harmony with my Austen nerd side. I won't lie, it's a good feeling.

potential new friends and an invitation

Today I visited my local Borders to buy the latest volume of a manga I love. While I was there, I spotted the graphic novel adaptation of Pride and Prejudice and, since I love Austen, sat down with a copy to see how Marvel had adapted the classic. As I was skimming the highlights of the adaptation, a woman sat next to me and looking at the book I was holding.
"Oh! You're reading Austen!" She said. I agreed that I was, although I amended that it was a graphic novel adaptation and not the original. She introduced herself as a member of the Jane Austen Society and invited me to attend their meetings. Apparently her group maintains a sort of book club in which they meet once a month. One meeting they will discuss an Austen novel, the next they will watch a film adaptation, and the next they discuss fanfiction for that novel. Interesting. I think I might go.
But it did get me thinking about how sometimes what seems like a chance encounter or an ordinary conversation becomes something more. When we meet people and start to get to know them, it opens up potential friendships and experiences.
I hope I will attend. And I hope that the experience will allow me to meet people and have interesting conversations and try something new. But besides that, I'm just really glad to have met this woman and talked with her. We probably only talked for 10 minutes or so, but the conversation meant a lot to me. She didn't give me life-changing advice or tell me what to do, but she was very warm and encouraging. The more I think about it, the more I realize that I do want to go to the Jane Austen Society and, while I do enjoy Jane Austen, it's because I want to meet and talk to new friends.